What’s up Monkeys, your Supreme Leader Mei here with another article. This time it’s carrying kilos of salt. The cause of my salt? The new Mercy and here’s why…

I’ve just been playing Mercy non stop on my accounts in gold, plat and diamond, and I must admit, I do really enjoy playing her. Her changes are great, OP even – in the right hands. She has a high impact on the game it can be positive if played by the right person, but 90% of the times in lower to mid tiers she has a terrible influence on the game. The reason? Her tempo rez.

Mercy’s tempo rez is amazing. It is probably the best thing to ever happen to Mercy ever. But, and it’s a big butt (get it? cuz her booty is fine) the tempo rez has huge problems. Both for Mercy and her teammates. So i’m gonna talk about some of the problems that irk me the most right now.

The “I Need Healing” Spam.

With the new Mercy, this has gotten waaaaay worse. It’s now being used to tell the Mercy to heal and/or rez. If I was able to get to your useless ass i might be able to keep you healed dumbass. I have 10 fucking seconds to get to you so if you die in a shit position out of my range I have to get to you on foot. Sorry to burst your bubble there but Guardian Angel does not go through walls and I practically have to hug your ass to rez you. So maybe if you spent less time raging at me for your own mistake we can actually win a game.

Entitled Fuckers That Suck Dick at the Game.

Yeah, I’m talking to you, you useless piece of shit DPS/Tank who is only feeding and not getting any kills. I have had a ginormous amount of useless DPS/Tank players who think they deserve my tempo rez just because they are playing DPS or Tank. You fuckers need to realise that there are more people in your team, and that I only have one rez and no reason to rez you if another player who is actually getting their kills dies at the same time as you. Give me one legit good reason why I should rez a DPS/Tank who only dies and doesn’t get kills above say a Hanzo getting all his arrows into the enemy team’s heads? Or why do you deserve to get the rez with no ult but we are about to engage in a team fight and our Zen/Lucio with ult just died? I will rez you when I can, but I will not prioritize resurrecting your ungrateful, unjustified, entitled ass.


Idiots with No Game Sense

I don’t fucking care how good you are at the game, if I just used my rez on someone I have a 30 SECOND COOLDOWN on my rez. There, I even typed that in bold so your thick skull might be able to pass that on to your brain. I also don’t care how good you are mechanically, because if you can not understand that if we just wiped the enemy team there is no fucking reason for me to use my reZ on your stupid ass, even if you have ult and wrecking face. The enemy team isn’t gonna be fighting for a while so work those lazy legs of yours and fucking respawn. Unless you are wrecking face and we have enough people on point to hold for a while I will always rez my Symmetra who has her teleporter. Why? Because she can bring more players back faster than me you dumb piece of shit. Finally, if you are stupid enough to get yourself surrounded by the enemy and die there, do not expect me to waste my precious rez on your incompetent ass. Just for the simple reason: You’ll fucking die immediately. Now if you didn’t overextend and get yourself killed like that… I would have used my rez on you. Pro tip guys: Look at your fucking kill feed. you know, those weird icons to the top right of you screen that show the heroes doing shit… it also shows you when I’ve just used my rez.

Mercy with a Buddy

This is probably what pisses me off the most. I get that you are friends and shit but seriously guys… Overwatch is a TEAM based game. You know… other than your buddy you have 4 other team mates in your team. Go suck each other off in a private match or something but pocket healing your buddy who by the way is absolutely useless and only using your rez on your buddy isn’t gonna help you win. At least find a god like player like our very own Ricky if you wanna use that strat. So be a good Mercy and fucking heal and rez the rest of your team.

The “Mercy Has Ult and Therefore She Will Rez Everyone” Way of Thinking

Yes you fucking twats, I have my ult. And yes, I get an extra rez and lower cooldown on it and more mobility. But that doesn’t mean I can rez the whole fucking team you idiots. The most I can get is realistically 3 maybe 4 if you guys actually die in a good place. That huge rez is history. That’s what old Mercy did; hide, then you all die on point and she rez your asses. New Mercy does not do that. New Mercy can only bring back one player every time she uses her rez. Ulting or not, there is no realistic way for her to rez you all. She also doesn’t have her invincibility anymore so she can die bringing your ungrateful ass back into the battle and trust me she does want you back in the fight. She also has to prioritise. So don’t be such a whiney bitch because she couldn’t bring you back.


The DPS Mercy Mentality

Of course its fun to finally be getting kills on Mercy and of course her fucking unlimited peashooter gun is tempting when she is ulting but ask yourself… are you really being useful when you get a couple kills and your team dies because you are not healing their asses? In the end, only you and maybe one or two members of your team survived, but the enemy team still wipes you because you lost too many players by trying to be a Soldier 76. This boils down to game awareness. You need to know when to pull out that peashooter and when to be a 2nd Zenyatta or Orisa. This makes of breaks your team fight.


Not that communication is a problem, you’re the first fucking person to be bowing up my inbox with insults, yelling at me or spamming the wheel for heals. So why don’t you use those communication skills of yours on something that could actually be positive for your team?

It makes Mercy’s life so much easier. How the fuck am I supposed to know you’re close to ult? If you don’t ping your ult percentage I don’t know how close you are. I can make a rough estimate by using the kill feed but i’m not always right. It’s not my fucking problem you don’t tell me shit and I can’t act accordingly. It would also help if you just fucking joined the voice channel so you can at least hear me screeching at you about how many seconds i still have left on my fucking rez. You know… the ability of mine that you so desperately want me to use on your ass. you can’t run in and die and expect me to rez you when I just fucking rezzed someone else. It’s not that hard.

There, my thoughts on the new Mercy. She is really really fucking good to play and with the right team mates, you just wreck face to the point where I do think she needs some kind of nerf. Just not the current one on PTR. I really think the new Mercy is a tad too reliant on communication with her team. She needs some way to communicate the cooldown on her rez and that’s just not there at the moment which kinda leads to some of the problems I mentioned above.

Hope you enjoyed reading my rant, you probably need something to wash away the salt.

  • TCT

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